Reese Chen 🥉

We set an annual travel budget, earmark one joint trip, and split the remainder 50–50 for solo. Calendar locks go in first with no overlap and clear max spend per trip. Expectations: no big joint decisions while away, one mid-trip text, and a re-entry dinner the night after you return. Works because money and time are predetermined, not debated mid-plan.

Starting with scarves is a great idea, they're straightforward and you see progress fast... For beginners, I'd go for something in acrylic, it's super affordable and comes in tons of colors without breaking the bank. It's forgiving too, doesn't split easily like some wool blends do, and you can find it at most craft stores for cheap. Just make sure it's a medium weight so your stitches don't get lost in the fluff. Works great. I made my first scarf with that and it turned out cozy, even if my edges were a bit wonky at first. If you're worried about tangling, practice with shorter lengths at the beginning, that helped me a lot.

Pick a calm moment and lead with care using I statements rather than blame. Try something like, "I care about you a lot, and I want to be there, but the long late night venting has been leaving me wiped out." Add reassurance like, "I am not abandoning you, I just need to find a way to support you and still take care of my energy." Ask consent to talk with, "Is this a good time to chat about it?" Keep it specific and reflect that their feelings matter so it does not land as rejection. Offer doable options so it feels like a plan instead of a shut down. For example, agree on a check in window earlier in the evening, set a 20 to 30 minute vent timer, or ask them to text first to see if you have bandwidth. You can also ask what they want from you in the moment with, "Do you want me to just listen or help problem solve?" If it is late or you are fried, say, "I care and I need to pause for tonight, can we pick this up tomorrow after dinner?" and then follow through. If you live together, set a simple cue like saying "quiet night" or suggest a short walk so the conversation has an end point built in. If the topics are heavy or constant, gently suggest widening their support, like talking to a counselor or another trusted person, and remind them that you are still in their corner. If they get upset, stay calm, repeat the care and the boundary, and give it a little time.

I spiraled about fair and equal for months, tracking minutes in my head, which was awful. The simple fix was picking two anchor tasks each we own on weekdays, then swapping on weekends. We also do a 10-minute joint tidy right after dinner because if I wait I never do it. No tallying, just sticky notes on the fridge so my brain stops buzzing.

To get dual 4K at 60 from one USB C you have two paths. MST hubs ride on your laptop's DisplayPort Alt Mode bandwidth, which means you only get two 4K60 screens if the laptop and hub both support DP 1.4 with DSC and the OS supports MST. Many Windows machines are DP 1.2 or the hub is limited, and macOS does not extend multiple displays over MST, so you end up with one 4K at 30. DisplayLink docks bypass those limits by sending compressed video over USB, need a driver, and are the most reliable way to do two 4K60 while keeping power and peripherals on the same cable. I would grab TJCXELE DisplayLink Dock. It does dual 4K at 60 Hz and delivers up to 100 W power to the laptop. Install the DisplayLink Manager driver, connect each monitor directly to the dock, use good HDMI 2.0 or DisplayPort cables, then set both screens to 3840 by 2160 at 60 in your display settings. It stays compact and quiet and you get your USB A gear through the same cable without juggling multiple adapters.