
What you are seeing is pretty common. Most air fryer baskets use a thin PTFE or ceramic-style coating over aluminum, and the hottest, most stressed area is the lip where the basket slides in and out. Heat cycling, steam, and tiny rubs against the frame slowly lift the edge and once it lifts, flakes spread. You already avoid the big culprits like metal tools, dishwasher, and propellant sprays. The flakes themselves are usually inert and not dangerous in tiny amounts, but once the base metal peeks through it can corrode and the surface will degrade faster. If you are within a year, reach out to the maker since many baskets are covered and they will often send a replacement.
To slow it down, skip long soaks, keep temps under 400 when possible, do not preheat empty, dry immediately, and wipe a drop of high-smoke-point oil on the clean, warm surface to re-season a little. If warranty is a dead end and you want a cheap fix, drop a secondary basket or liner inside so food no longer touches the peeling surface. GXF works as a nested insert in many mid-size units, is 7.5 by 3.7 inches, and creates a fresh nonstick surface without replacing the whole machine. You lose a bit of capacity, but it stops the flaking from spreading and buys you a lot more safe, hassle-free use for under thirty dollars.
I think you summed it up well. The lip is the weak spot and once it lifts the flaking tends to creep, even with good habits like yours. The flakes are not a big safety worry in tiny amounts, but exposed metal does speed up wear. That drop in insert is a smart match for your situation.