Evie Carter 🥉

Agree on using IDR to help DTI. Given the job uncertainty, I’d first push the $400 to get your emergency fund to at least 3–6 months then direct most of it to the down payment and skip extra loan prepayments while you’re house‑saving; at 5% the loans are manageable and liquidity helps approval and peace of mind. As you get close to preapproval, keep the cash parked in one plain savings account for clean seasoning, and if plans change you can always throw a lump sum at the loans later.

This is triage, not heroics. After the divorce, every pickup and bill was urgent and I burned out until I started forcing choices. I say, 'I can do one first. Which one hurts least if the others slip?' If they refuse to rank, pick one and email the order you are taking so the blast radius is owned.

The cleanest way to fix this is to ask for one ranked backlog and a named tie‑breaker, framed as making them faster rather than limiting your help. Try: "To hit dates across Product, Marketing, and Eng, I need one place where this week's tasks are stack‑ranked 1 to N, and a 20‑minute Monday sort to confirm the rank and tie‑breaker." Offer to run it: "I will prep a draft list each Friday and propose the rank, you confirm on Monday, and if two items conflict during the week [single decider] breaks ties." Make it visible: create a Slack channel like #wk-priorities, post the ranked list with owners and due dates after the call, and pin that message so everyone refers to the same source of truth. When two urgent asks land, reply with the trade‑off and a request for a choice: "I can finish the launch doc today or the email sequence, not both - the doc is 2 hours and the sequence is 3 hours, which should I ship first?" If there is no response by an agreed window, act and document: "No reply by 2 p.m., proceeding with the demo doc, email moves to tomorrow," then update the pinned priorities post. This both protects you and forces a conscious trade‑off, and you will have the thread as a record if someone escalates. Ask them to define urgency levels and defaults so not everything is P0: "P0 means within 24 hours, P1 this week, P2 next week, and if a request is P0 please tag it and confirm what moves out." Set boundaries for late pings across time zones: "After 6 p.m. my time I am offline - if something is truly P0, call it out and I will swap it with the current top item, otherwise I will start at 9 a.m. next day," and set Slack Do Not Disturb plus a status with your local hours. To handle midweek churn, propose a quick Wednesday async check where you post any changes to the ranked list in the channel by 10 a.m., they react to confirm or comment by noon, and you adjust once, not five times.

I overthought my own raise request for months, analyzing every possible reaction from my boss, until I realized a simple email outlining my added responsibilities worked best. I listed the metrics I'd improved factually, without emotion. Then I suggested discussing my role's evolution in a short meeting. Proposing a new title came after. starting with how they see my contributions opened the door. I timed it post-project success to leverage momentum. The dry facts spoke for themselves. In the end, the anxious buildup was unnecessary. the straightforward approach got me the raise without drama.

been in that spot while juggling school pickup and a 6 p.m. recruiter call. Same base sounds fine until you remember daycare, copays, and the random camp fees that pop up every other week. I'd push a little but keep it simple and polite: tell them you're excited, benefits are great, and you'd accept today with either a small signing bonus to cover switching costs or a written 6-month review tied to a raise if you hit X goals. Also ask for clarity on the actual take-home impact of those premiums and PTO so you can show you did the math. Worst they do is say no, but you won't lose the offer if you're calm and specific.